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Captain's Log: Week 5 & 6

With the stay at home order, some of us have become best friends :)

The younger 3 went for a walk with me. 
I can't even describe how beautiful the sky is right now. 
All that congestion and air pollution has been eliminated from
 everyone staying home in Los Angeles. 
Part of me feels mother earth needed a break from us :)
It is so evident living here. 

Henry doing a cheer pose...haha. 
Always looking for thematic laughs.


Audrey looking appropriately 14 in this photo. 

more poses and Chester just chuckling at his "weird" older siblings.



they love each other too :)

playing Life

Although, I think life seems pretty real right now!
I am concerned for people not working here. 
I am concerned for families and children here who are struggling. 


We are all stretching in different ways. I liked this quote below :)



Clay is building a garden on our hill. 
Unfortunately, it is quickly heating up here. I encouraged him to do it when he wanted to just shovel the  dirt back into the hole...he was wondering what the point was. I don't know the point, but I thought just having a tangible hobby to come home to in the evenings would be nice for him. 
Work remains stressful and draining on him  :(

but along with that, he is home and not traveling which makes my own life a million times happier

It is looking good. Clay likes to make messes. 
And out of those messes he makes life beautiful...

it's the living in the mess part I have a hard time with, haha :)


Beyond walking and digging, the kids are doing school each day. 
Some days are more of a struggle than others. My main concern is math for Henry and Audrey and reading/literacy for Chester. 
Sigh. 
Chester is just like me...just can't be bothered with too many details that you can get lost in for comprehension.
 Luckily Henry is fantastic at it and helped him out.

I am aware that teens like sleeping but this one is sleeping like 11-12 hours a night! And hasn't grown.
 I don't get it.
 The picture above was taken at 10:30 am as he rolled out of bed...this isn't even a worthy battle to pick.
To be honest, I just feel more at peace.
So, other than the typical..."stand up straight!" or "brush your teeth!" I have laid off. 
So far, it's working :)

Go ahead and sit on the couch for schoolwork!

sidenote: Audrey is THE most organized. 
She is a total boss!

April chalkboard

nothing on it
slightly metaphorical


Lucy having the time to take care of her skin!
 She has been keeping in shape with workouts from the Cal Poly Slo coaches and running with her neighborhood friend Melissa. 
Her skin tends to clear up in the off season.
In the midst of all of the disappointments for her senior year...the silver lining is... she is home! 
She has been so busy for 4 straight years...it has been a nice break to be with her before the college years begin.

I have been throwing a lot of football with Chester. 
So, apparently, I am a p.e. teacher too :)



the flowers in the front are blossoming and looking absolutely gorgeous

the abundant white roses are popping in the front and backyards too





Masks placed in a bowl on our entry table. 
You have to have them on in all places. 
But not in your car or on a walk.  


For the most part we are home.
But yesterday, I took the kids to Target.
 I wanted them to see what it was like out there. People seemed normal. 
People seemed to make more eye contact. 
Maybe this is our new normal? Or temporary normal?
I figured out how to see if anyone is smiling underneath their mask!
 Just look into their eyes.
 The eyes give it away.
 They stretch out, have a glint in them, eyebrows change too.
 I realized I probably don't smile enough. 
Strangely, I made a deal with myself at the beginning of the year to smile more.
Maybe it counts as my social goal :)
 I feel happier when I do but I don't think I was a born "smiler" (not a word) :)


There is so much to learn right now.
  I have had days where I feel like my best self. 
And days where I can see the self I want to be. And, actually getting there :)

 I have also had rough days.
I think we all have.

 The job notices, the pay cut, the rearranging of life and what you thought would be happening which is certainly not happening the way you had imagined or happening at all.

big sigh for the letdowns




I think one way I have succeeded is by not fighting all of the directives.
 It can feel so restrictive.
 But you know what might be worse?

 All of the contention from watching or reading the news can bring. 
That restricts me finding peace.

Or what mom or church leader is being amazing out there going above and beyond meanwhile...
 I am riding low and steady.
Comparison restricts me from seeing my potential and accomplishments.

And then my own judgy observations...
What? No mask? You hugged your Grandma? they won't let us on the beaches? You are driving to see out of state family? wait what?
Those thoughts restrict me from seeing people the way God wants me to see them. Or catching a glimpse of a larger picture that I don't understand yet.

exhausting

I have spent the last 2 years on empty. 
2 years of total mental and emotional exhaustion.
In light of all of these difficult circumstances, I feel lighter now.
I don't know why.
But I probably know why.
I could be at quarter tank.



Captain logging off until next week or the week after or the week after that :)
p.s we are all smiling under those masks!
Are you?

air hugs and kisses xoxo

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